I have visited moon ... I wish I hadn`t

Take me to the moon!                                          

Take me to the celestial orb that has hung there, out of reach and unchanging, in the sky for innumerable centuries. But not so unchanged. It has transformed. It has transformed from being a curiosity, to a god, to a goddess, to an angel, to a curiosity, to a heavenly body. It has transformed as we have transformed.

And it transforms as a person does. During childhood it is a cherished toy, a longing. During youth it represents the face of beloved. Then during dotage it just reminds of good, gone days.

But there was none so transformation as cataclysmic as was brought by Moon-taxi. This transformation was from a place unreachable to a place finally within reach, from enigma to just an exotic place. The multitude of people who rushed to moon-taxi after this service was opened was unprecedented. By seeing the enthusiasm of people it seemed that rush would never stop.

This was unexpected. True, they had thought many adventurers, tourists, millionaires would jump at this opportunity. But no one could have imagined queues of ordinary people, commoners and commuters, lining up to get to moon. But then everyone had underestimated the human nature. No one had truly prophesied its eagerness and readiness to trample anything that poses a challenge to it. To abolish any enigma, to vanquish any mystery. Moon by its aloofness had posed as just an object and when it were finally within reach there was no stopping people. They had to conquer, to solve this mystery.

Visit to moon became bazaar-talk. It seemed no one was left who hadn`t visited moon. I, however, was one. So I felt very uneasy. When I went , the initial rush was over. However even then the taxi-stand was bustling with people.

Now by this time reports had started to come that the natural beauty of moon is being marred by human settlement. So I had made it a point that I would go straight to the natural part of moon. Not obliterated by human activities- in any case not yet.

During journey I was ruminating my past. I was thinking about the very private, intimate affair and relationship I had with moon ever since I was child. The daily trysts with moon during nights when I had shared all my pathos, hopes, aspirations, everything. Ever since I remember, I have been captivated by moon, enchanted by it. It gave me a feeling of affection and it braced me, giving me strength. While looking at it I felt at ease. I sensed as if I was in mother nature`s soothing lap. People called me lunatic- “lunar lunatic” to be precise. But I do not understand. I cannot comprehend how this in unnatural or odd. Indeed I cannot imagine how anyone can fail to be captured by moon, or live without such emotional prop.

Now I am going towards it. The place that has always haunted my imagination. Towards the beloved one. The reason I had delayed in going there was the crowd of people. Now looking at all other fellow passengers I felt spite for them. What are they doing? It is my beloved. No one else has right to love it. I hated everyone. I felt they had stolen my precious, my intimate possession.

But when I landed on surface of moon I forgot everything. As soon as my feet touched ground there was nothing but oblivion. It was amazing. No object was visible till horizon. Strange emptiness and eerie silence reigned. There was in atmosphere the rotting and quiescence of millennia. Ground felt liquid under my feet. Grotesque shaped stones, stillness, quaint emptiness, odd craters and depressions. It emanated a sense of oldness. Weathered and battered it nevertheless stole my breath. I looked here and there greedily, I could not get enough. Could not quench my thirst. I began hopping with exhilaration. Screaming into the rarefied atmosphere to give vent to my prodigious jubilation. I felt I can spend my whole life like this, indeed I wanted to spend my whole life like this. I jumped as light as air , a butterfly in garden full of roses, a salmon in freshwater.
 
But at length I sobered down. Gradually this exultation subsided, to be replaced by boredom .but I continued to wander. I had come so far, I had to make it worth it. Though I didn`t felt like it I forced myself to take interest in hopelessly monotonous scenario. Until, I could take it no more. Try as I would, by reminding that I am at a remarkable and amazing place and this is my chance to see it. I must make most of now. I failed to rekindle any flame of interest. I failed to fight away the setting tedium.
 
Exhausted from this arduous, hopping expedition I jadedly made my way back to settlement. Despite my former antipathy I found it a welcome place. Bustling with life and activity amidst the deserted stretches, Boasting light and warmth in contrast to darkness and cold that surrounded it, an oasis of life fighting away loneliness and hollowness around, an island of animation within ocean of stillness; it was not a place that could fail to grip and awe you.

I treaded the streets gazing wide-eyed and open-mouthed at the ornaments, lunar emblems, souvenirs and such odds and ends adorning colored stalls. Tall observatories and grim space-stations.

Now i am going back to it again .When I was back on earth. After a few days the days I had spent on moon seemed magical. When I looked at moon (as was my habit) I remembered and relished those days. I took much more pleasure in reliving them than in living them. Then it turned into a yearning to go back, eventually it also ran cold.

Now when I look at moon (as was my habit) I see not moon but those barren and battered stretches. I remember those visions of past and my joyful hopping. But anyway I am glad that I have visited moon. In any case there would have been those acute pangs of not seeing it (while being able to).
 
Ah those pangs, the arch stone of allure of moon. Those longings of childhood which connected me with moon. Now I have seen moon, sated those longing. But moon has lost its enigma, allure and appeal. Now I cannot see it for more than five minutes without being enmeshed by musings of my own.
 
I have seen moon but lost my childhood solace and old confidante. The moon has lost its lure. It doesn`t look that fascinating now. It is just a barren stretch of land now, no more. Not a mystical patron, nor a mythical friend. Just a barren stretch of land. I have lost it. Lost it irrevocably.

 
I have visited moon…… I wish I hadn`t.